This is a question I have been mulling over for the past several weeks. I am sure that it will take a lifetime to learn the answer. I can answer it with "unmerited favor from God", but I feel like this answer is no more accurate and precise than answering "what is a derivative?" with "a mathematical formula", or "what is a car?" with "a machine to take me places". I am barely scratching the surface and I don't really understand it.
As I look at my life and what is going on, I feel myself asking the Lord as when Keilah (not quite 3) comes up to me and asks in her sweet high pitched voice "what'cha doooin?" followed by a myriad of "whyyyy?" to every statement after the first answer.
The first attempt at selling the house fell through. I had another potential buyer interested that appeared in what seemed to be a miraculous way, but it also fell through as he was dramatically low-balling me. It has become so discouraging that I am not sure what I should do next. Try another realtor? Try for sale by owner and cragislist? When to re-list? I am going to Mexico in 6 days and I don't want people calling and emailing when I can't reply, so I had taken the for sale sign down. I just got rear-ended in my car and didn't notice the damage so barely got info from the other driver and now I am needing to go to the chiropractor for my neck and back and I need to figure out what to do next regarding the damage I noticed later.
My closest friend and her husband have just 2 weeks ago moved to Bulgaria led by the Lord. In many events leading up to their departure I could see the hand of the Lord in favor toward them and myself. They had planned to leave the day before my birthday and as the day approached and I struggled with the timing of it, I felt the Lord speak to my heart saying "Can you believe I can make it special?". We had unexpected changes of plans that resulted in us celebrating my birthday in NY City the day after their original departure date. The Lord poured out grace upon grace as we dealt with unexpected events and a bonus birthday week for me of fellowship together to treasure as we are far away from each other!!!
Do I know what He is doing? Do I understand grace? Not really, not yet, not deeply. I can honestly say that I don't know what the Lord is doing, but I am learning to trust in Him with my little understanding of Grace, believing and knowing that what He is doing is good ... that the outcome of what He is doing will be good ... that I can be hopeful and excited because He plans nothing but good!
Monday, May 16, 2011
Monday, May 9, 2011
New Trip Ahead ...13 days to Mexico!!!
I have done much praying and for a long time of fervently desiring to go see my little sister, Chelsea Rae, and several other brothers and sisters in Christ at Rancho Maranatha in Mexico. I was blessed to have gone to visit over 7 years ago when Chelsea's entire family was serving there. Since Chelsea has returned, I have been privileged to be involved in prayer and I have been longing to get involved in person.
I was blessed beyond measure to go to Haiti and I wouldn't trade it, but I knew that going then would mean that I couldn't go to Mexico just yet. Even then, I was able to embrace the Lord's fully trusting that He would open the door in the future. Well, now is that time!
On my way to PR (when I was going to Haiti) I was able to sign up for a special deal for airline miles and now I got a ticket practically free to take me into Mexico for the dates that I wanted!!! This saves a lot of time on the bus and gets me closer to my final destination! The ticket would normally cost about $900, so this is huge! The cool thing is that shortly before I was able to get the tickets, I had a dream in which I was going to Mexico and after landing I was already past the border, which normally wouldn't be case if I were to take the bus from Tucson (12 hrs overnight), but it is true with this itinerary.
I will be flying into Hermosillo, Sonora, Mexico (A on map) and traveling by bus or car to the ranch (close to Alamos - B on map). It is somewhat close to the gulf of California. This is the map of where I will be:
http://maps.google.com/maps?f=d&source=s_d&saddr=Hermosillo,+Sonora,+Mexico&daddr=%C3%81lamos,+Sonora,+Mexico&geocode=FaLduwEdTt1i-Snlrt96aITOhjH5f4jplVM9sw%3BFSxonAEdILWB-SkDsMcbBWe4hjHr3rvHKyQOXA&hl=en&mra=ls&sll=29.084977,-110.950928&sspn=8.194378,13.348389&ie=UTF8&ll=25.621716,-108.632812&spn=16.872222,26.696777&z=6
I leave for Mexico May 21 and arrive there May 22 a bit before noon. I will be leaving Mexico June 5 and arriving in Rochester June 6 in the morning.
I long to see what the ministry is involved with and to refresh my brothers and sisters there. It also appears that the Lord is opening the doors for a lot of once in a lifetime opportunities that I am very excited about, although I know that I will go from cool weather to extremely hot! The Lord will help me through the adjustment. I couldn't be more excited!!!!
I was blessed beyond measure to go to Haiti and I wouldn't trade it, but I knew that going then would mean that I couldn't go to Mexico just yet. Even then, I was able to embrace the Lord's fully trusting that He would open the door in the future. Well, now is that time!
On my way to PR (when I was going to Haiti) I was able to sign up for a special deal for airline miles and now I got a ticket practically free to take me into Mexico for the dates that I wanted!!! This saves a lot of time on the bus and gets me closer to my final destination! The ticket would normally cost about $900, so this is huge! The cool thing is that shortly before I was able to get the tickets, I had a dream in which I was going to Mexico and after landing I was already past the border, which normally wouldn't be case if I were to take the bus from Tucson (12 hrs overnight), but it is true with this itinerary.
I will be flying into Hermosillo, Sonora, Mexico (A on map) and traveling by bus or car to the ranch (close to Alamos - B on map). It is somewhat close to the gulf of California. This is the map of where I will be:
http://maps.google.com/maps?f=d&source=s_d&saddr=Hermosillo,+Sonora,+Mexico&daddr=%C3%81lamos,+Sonora,+Mexico&geocode=FaLduwEdTt1i-Snlrt96aITOhjH5f4jplVM9sw%3BFSxonAEdILWB-SkDsMcbBWe4hjHr3rvHKyQOXA&hl=en&mra=ls&sll=29.084977,-110.950928&sspn=8.194378,13.348389&ie=UTF8&ll=25.621716,-108.632812&spn=16.872222,26.696777&z=6
I leave for Mexico May 21 and arrive there May 22 a bit before noon. I will be leaving Mexico June 5 and arriving in Rochester June 6 in the morning.
I long to see what the ministry is involved with and to refresh my brothers and sisters there. It also appears that the Lord is opening the doors for a lot of once in a lifetime opportunities that I am very excited about, although I know that I will go from cool weather to extremely hot! The Lord will help me through the adjustment. I couldn't be more excited!!!!
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